your opinion is irrelevant because you're a cunt

why can’t plane tickets be like 10 dollars

(Source: superhighschoollevelhope-archive, via fake-mermaid)

mukuroikusaba:

seing a funny post but it only has like 3 notes and youre like “am i allowed to reblog that”

(via fake-mermaid)

fake-mermaid:

look what my friend did to her dog i can’t breathe

slydig:

slydig:

welcome to swaggie land

population: me

i lost 3 followers

(via kiss-me-till-i-drop)

slytherin-starkid-of-tardis:

phinflynn:

“Ah, Perry the platypus!”

“What an unexpected -“

“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!”

“You’re trapped!”

“By societal convention!”

“Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”

“That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down.”

This show is fucking brilliant.

(via i-just-want-to-escape-reality)

brittabaggles:

do you ever just refuse to go to bed because that means tomorrow is going to happen

(Source: frankybluerichards, via fake-mermaid)

gameboycoloured:

u know my url not my html

(Source: trillow, via crrocs)

archangelgaybriel:

mikerotone:

cinnamontoastcrunchchallenge:

when i die, my tombstone wont say RIP

it will say VIP

That’s because they reserved a special place in hell for you

yeah the throne

(Source: bbqringolos, via crrocs)

“When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, “Ah, yes, that’s Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, being played backwards.” He listened a while longer, and said, “There’s the Eighth Symphony, and it’s backwards, too. Most puzzling.” So the magistrate kept listening; “There’s the Seventh… the Sixth… the Fifth…” Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, “My fellow citizens, there’s nothing to worry about. It’s just Beethoven decomposing.”

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humor-us:

bow-ties-and-a-deer-stalker:

cocokat:

personababy:

span-kun:

imnotquiteaswell:

phazondragon:

crystalsoulslayer:

slytherinmychamber:

hotel-denouement:

moral-highground:

yougotredonyou:

nicklex:

hannahisdead:

oh my god

BEST JOKE.

THIS JOKE SHALL BE TOLD FOREVER

SCREAMS

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH.

HEEEHEE I LOVE SILLY MUSIC JOKES

NERD JOKE!

ahahahahahaha

(Source: caplan, via laugh-addict)

i can’t have a soul mate because i have no soul

(Source: partybarackisinthehousetonight, via fake-mermaid)